August 2, 2013: Salpingectomy

The day was finally here.  It was the morning of my surgery.  I couldn't sleep...I had tossed and turned all night.  I knew having surgery was what I needed to do to get one step closer to becoming a mom, but at the same time, I was sad.  I knew this was going to be a positive things, but I would be losing a fallopian tube....a sentimental piece of me, in the process.  I woke up so early that morning.  The sun was barely breaking through the little amount of clouds that were present.  I went outside with Kaia, and just started to think about everything that had led up to this very point in time, and began to cry.  I just couldn't believe that it had all come to this.  My doctor kept telling me that my tube needed to come out, but I had been in such denial...and here I was.  Olivia..(my husband's aunt, who is one of my best friends, and basically a big sister to me).. saw me crying outside in the yard.  She ran up to me and just held me in her arms, telling me that everything would be alright.  She always knows what to say and what to do, to calm me down.  Now that's a gift.  My phone rang and it was my dad returning my call I had previously made to him.  I started to bawl again, telling him I called him because of how scared I was.  I could here the concern in my dad's voice.  He immediately called Miguel, telling him to keep him posted throughout the day, and to make sure they give me something for the anxiety.  

I dried my eyes and went back inside.  The past two evenings I had bathed in a special soap, and now I had to shower again before we headed to the hospital. After my shower, Miguel asked me if I was ok, and I told him that I felt sad and had been crying.  He comforted me and that gave me the strength I needed to keep going.  That day I had such a huge support group at the hospital with me, which included:  Miguel, my mom, my stepdad, and Olivia.  I felt so loved..... After all, I couldn't do it without their support, and the support of others very close to me, who couldn't physically be there.  I knew I needed to do this and I could get through it.  

We got to the hospital, and I was still so nervous.  They called me back to the room to get some paperwork done.  Everything seemed to just happen so fast.  Immediately after my paperwork, they had me change into a gown and socks.  Everyone at the hospital kept telling me that when I do have a baby, it was going to be a boy.  This was because my nails, hospital gown, and socks were all the same color blue!  Before I knew it, they had the iv in my hand.  I laid on the hospital bed alone with my mind racing... waiting for them to allow my family back to visit me, two at a time.  My mom and Miguel were the to first to come back.  They couldn't believe that I was already dressed and ready to go!  Miguel never left my side as the others switched in and out.  As Miguel calmly sat there holding my hand, my mom looked so worried and emotional.  She didn't stay with me for too long, so that Olivia and my stepdad could visit me as well.  

The anesthesiologist came by and said that he was going to go through everything with me that would be involved during the procedure.  I told him "you are exactly the person that I wanted to talk to!" Lol..  I decided to ask about getting an epidural once again, instead of having him put me to sleep.  Of course this was going to be a big fat no for an answer, but I figured it was worth a try.  He told me that the reason why they don't do epidurals for this surgery is because before they start the procedure, they will be inflating my abdomen with gas to lift it.  Therefore, I would not be breathing on my own, and they would have a breathing tube down my throat, breathing for me.  Ummmmm... yea this did not make me feel any better about the situation.  The anesthesiologist was very good with his words and the way he described things to me, to make me feel more secure about going under.  He told me that all of the medications were completely reversible, and that your body naturally reverses them on it's own.  He also told me that waking people up is not the issue, but keeping them asleep.  This made me feel better about being on those drugs.  Dr. Crochet came in and it was officially game time!  We talked very briefly and then it was time to go into the operating room.  So to take the edge off, they gave me a little medication intravenously.  I literally felt like I had at least 5 shots of tequila in me.  My anxiety was gone, and I was ready to go.  I kissed my family and they wheeled me away.

I remember them rolling me into the operating room.  There were so many tools and people everywhere.  The lights were so bright.  I didn't care because my body felt so good.  I didn't have a single worry in the world at that moment in time.  They asked me to shimmy my body off the bed and onto the operating table.  I mumbled,  "There's alot of people and alot of stuff in here".  The bright lights blinded me, and I was out.  

When the surgery was all said and done, the doctor had my family wait in a room to discuss his findings.  He went through each and every picture he took and thoroughly went through his findings and results with them. 

The surgery took approximately 3 hours.  When I woke up in recovery, the nurse was waiting for me.  I didn't feel any pain, but then again, I was still so out of it.  She moved me into a wheelchair and helped me change into my regular clothes before my family could come back to see me.  I kept thinking to myself "What the heck is she doing..."  I remember not being able to see too clearly because I didn't have my glasses.  My family was finally with me again.  I vaguely remember Miguel trying to show me pictures of the surgery and trying to explain them to me, but that is all just a blur.  The nurse told me that I had to try and urinate before the doctor would release me, and if I didn't urinate they would have to give me a catheter to drain my bladder. The up and down, to and from the restroom was making me so nauseous.  I could barely walk, much less urinate.   I definitely didn't want a catheter, so I kept trying to go to the restroom to avoid this, and eventually I urinated.  Thank goodness.

 Now I was on the road to recovery, and was ready to hear the results for myself once the drugs wore off.  I did it... finally!  This was a big step in our journey with infertility.